dearblankpleaseblank.com

Dear teens,

It's "before," not "b4."

Sincerely, this is your homework, not bingo.

Dear people behind me,

I promise the line hasn't moved. Stop getting closer.

Sincerely, personal space issues.

Dear Concerned Parents,

Why was I home late? Oh, you know, the usual... landing in jail, running across railroads, and spending hundreds of dollars.

Sincerely, seriously though, monopoly is a really long game.

Dear girls who say they love nerds,

There is a HUGE difference between nerds and hot guys who wear glasses.

Sincerely, an actual nerd.

Dear people complaining about not having flying cars,

You can barely drive your car on the ground.

Sincerely, the curb you just checked.

Dear 12 year old girl who just asked me who NSYNC was,

My heart just broke a little bit.

Sincerely, you're making me feel old.

Dear ladies,

There is no such things as automatic doors... just gentlemen ninjas.

Sincerely, anonymous.

Dear Google Earth,

Thank you for making me feel like a God.

Sincerely, spinning the earth the other way.

Dear Schoolhouse Rock,

Please make educational songs for college students as well.

Sincerely, think about it.

Dear dictionaries,

You've done a great job but I'll take it from here...

Sincerely, Google.

Dear homeless guy shaking a can full of money,

Show off...

Sincerely, college student.

Dear white people using chopsticks,

It doesn't make the experience more authentic...

Sincerely, Asian using a fork.

Dear iTunes,

Current Balance: $0.01.

Sincerely, now what?

P.S. You're welcome!